Monday, May 20, 2013

Moving Right Along

Bolder Boulder is quickly approaching and Rick and I have not decided on our costumes. A costume store adventure with his daughter Sophia was a bust for ideas, too. However, we did have a pretty awesome game of hide and seek afterwards, which was hysterical.

I had an overall decent weekend at the club. Pretty excited because there has already been talk about putting me on the bar, which would mean big time more money!! So that would be awesome. I am a little nervous though because the late nights definitely caught up with me this week and I have FOUR shifts next week. One being Sunday night before Bolder Boulder. I am sure hoping adrenaline will get me through my first 10K, haha.

I was a little sadden this week when I was offered a full time position to work on Martha's Vineyard for the summer. If only the question had come two months ago, I would have been all for it. The timing is just not right now. I am pretty invested here and know if would not be as beneficial to go. Gosh, always having to be the level headed, think things out type of person is sometimes tiring and disappointing. In my heart, I know it just wasn't meant to be. There are plenty other adventures meant to be had.

I basically moved into my bosses over the weekend, which has been fabulous. It is amazing what having one's own space can really do for you. Sometimes I forget how much I need to just get away from the world, and this place is sure good for that. I will be here till the end of the month, when I move into my new digs. I wish I could explain how excited I am to have a pool table in the house again!

But that begs the question of what to do once this lease is up...Apartment by myself, get a roommate, live on property or off, the list is endless. Will I have enough money to get my things out to Colorado? Hopefully if I start bartending I can pay off the one credit card I have right now and then save up some money too so get my stuff here. I MISS MY STUFF lol... esp my bed! Plus I miss having my own space! I know having a roommate would be cheaper, but I honestly miss having my own place soo much that I keep leaning toward it, we shall see what happens.

I stopped to think today about all of the things I am involved in right now, and I am pretty sure I have talked about this frequently, but I think I am still amazed at myself for thinking I can handle all of this...

1) Three jobs: Full Time renting apartments (40 hrs/wk); part-time marketing for Taft (10 hrs/wk); part-time cocktail waitress (10-20 hrs/wk)
2) Toastmasters (Thursday nights - more work required if giving a speech)
3) Volunteering at the Humane Society (2-4 hours a week)
4) Online Class (newest one is "Developing Innovative Ideas for New Companies: The First Step in Entrepreneurship") (4-6 hours a week)
5) Dating -- weird new addition
6) In the midst of reading and watching Game of Thrones series
7) Moving
8) Church/religion
9) Making and building new friendships

I want to be working on:
10) Job/career search - including pursuing TSC
11) My travel guide idea
12) Networking
13) Learning a new language (should hopefully finally be finishing the set up tomorrow)
14) Exercising/gym time
15) Get back to pole!
16) Exploring

I am officially a crazy person, I have decided. Gosh, I am not quite sure how I do it, especially with all of the other everyday issues of life. I am missing my friends and family and trying to keep in touch with everyone. Struggling with emotions and feelings that I am just not used to on so many different levels. And trying to be my regular happy self through it all. Good thing I am a trooper!

Have you challenged yourself today?
*Star*

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Goodness Gracious Continued

PART 2!

Somehow, after a thankfully much better Saturday night at the club, I managed to get my butt up for Church on Sunday morning. Which turned into a 2 hour affair and me offering to help in the kids area and meeting the pastor (who I have to admit is pretty awesome). This is such a weird feeling, this desire for church in my life, which is going side by side with learning more about my Wiccan side, guess something deep inside is looking for guidance. In the mean time I just keep chugging forward.

After church, Rick picked me up from the house and gave me three options for lunch. I obviously went with sushi - although it still weirds me out a little bit not being near the water. I WISH I could explain how much I miss Sushi X and Sushi Palace and this one place near Somerville in Boston... oh gosh I MISS sushi and all of my sushi buddies -- Shauna and Wayne, Star, Kerri, Jenn, Michele, oo so many of you!

After lunch and a nice long talk... a lot of it about my recent religious choices... He has a degree in religious studies... we went and got ice cream. I skipped the gluten ice cream in favor of a simple mint chocolate ship which was delicious. Then we headed off to Gateway Park to ride the go-carts - I totally kicked butt to the point he was going to try and cheat lol. Then I beat him at air hockey. We caused a crazy line to form at fruit ninja and wandered through this silly human sized maze. Then it was off to mini golf, which I am always so mediocre at and ultimately lost my ball on the 14th hole and instead of getting me a new ball he just through his in the water too and off we went -- I was sad we missed the very awkward looking gorilla hole. A few more games and it was on to big kid games.

We ventured to this dive bar, which I think might be one of my new favorite places. Its dark and dingy and as we walked in there was a shuffle board table! I was soo excited more little pieces of home finding their way to me! The bartender ensured we had called our moms for Mother's Day before he served us, which I thought was awesome. The place has darts, pool table, fooseball, and awful sex packets in the bathrooms! What more could you want!? I had to get back for 5 to watch Grayce for Jess, so he dropped me back off at the house. Surprisingly, almost five hours went by pretty quickly, with an abundance of laughs, overall great afternoon.

Will had been home for the weekend, so he was headed out to the airport when I got back and Jess was off to work. In an attempt to keep Grayce's mind off of it and try to have some fun we headed off to the park at her school -- it is definitely the coolest one near us. We walked over and had some fun conversations - Grayce is just a smart kid its too funny sometimes. Somehow we were talking about how her friend Harper had been in cast at the beginning of the year, which turned into some weird omen/coincidence... Grayce in the monkey bar queen! We literally cannot go to a park that does not have monkey bars. Well Grayce's first go across the bars ends in a very scary fall and lots of crying and screaming. I think my shock and the scariness of it only lasted two seconds. Just enough to know it was more than a scare and she was really hurt. She is a tough kid, so it was awful to see her like that. I ended up carrying/piggy backing her all the way back to the house -- I seriously need to get back to the gym!! We got some meds in her and ice on it, but sadly it was no good. Turns out it is pretty bad and after 5 days and multiple doctors appointments the poor girl is going to have to get surgery on her arm because a growth plate in her elbow moved a lot. She has been a star through all that I have seen, poor Jess!! I wish her quick healing!

Monday was doctors - happy to know everything checked out good with me -- probably not going to be happy when I get those bills... thank you for nothing exceptionally high deductible health insurance. I got a LOT of Taft work done and then had a cooking party for our work cook off at Rick's. I made stuffed cabbage rolls with brown rice (first time using the rice cooker... oddly not a fan lol), three types of sausage, onions, baby bellas, red peppers and cheese. Which ended up winning my category! Our property SWEPT the other property in all four categories, it was a little awkward, but AWESOME!

Tuesday night I went down to Denver and met up with one of Manson's friends who was absolutely a delight. And her friends were just as great. We went to Drag Queen Bingo and it was an absolute blast. I spent entirely too much money, but it was worth it - my burger (on a crescent roll sooo yum!) and my drinks were the perfect addition to the company and entertainment. Most probably I will hang out with them on Sunday as Kat and her boyfriend as having their House Warming party. I am excited to have some new friends to look forward to hanging out with!

Wednesday was tough since I went out on Tuesday and got back late, I had to get up really early to do Taft work. Well that made it so I was tired when I got to the club for work Wednesday night. Silly me... who NEVER drinks caffeine... decided it would be a great idea to have TWO large glasses of energy drink... SOO not smart, especially because the second one was around midnight. My the time I got home around 3am I was exhausted and completely wired. What an AWFUL combination! I did not fall asleep for what felt like forever and then was woken up multiple times with texts... Needless to say that made for a tough day today. I was working on maybe 3 hours of fragmented sleep... I still am not sure if I was thankful for the AMP that Tony brought me this morning to help me get through the day. My poor stomach was about ready to have a break down.

But I made it through the work day, quite barely. I kept it together long enough to deliver my Toastmasters speech, which was hardly practiced. I totally forgot to write an ending for my speech, but besides that, I think it went pretty well. I was definitely shaking still for a good five minutes after I finished presenting my speech, but no one else seemed to notice. I thought of going out with my bod Thomas for a drink afterwards, but I realized I still had Taft work to do, plus my wind was wearing off and I figured I would pass out very soon. Yea that was at 9pm... here it is 3 hours later, I finish my Taft work and blabbered on for two entirely too long posts. I hope you all enjoy these... I am officially going to crash.

Here is to more craziness!
*Star*

Goodness Gracious

Gosh, I have completely forgot when the last time I posted... or quite frankly, what it was about. I know I have thought about posting a few times. I have done it once again and completely overbooked myself, but it actually feels good. Almost, like I am getting back to myself. More than I can say for quite some time.

Quick Catch up and overview:

Tuesday and Wednesday (5/7 and 5/8) I had training down in Denver for my job. I actually really enjoyed the training and the people I met were pretty cool. Of course today I got made to look like complete suck up because I was the first one to turn in our "homework". But whatever I have a prize coming in the mail!

Tuesday I went to Paul Mitchell Salon school, which was cool because it brought a little piece of home to me. My hairdresser was so adorable and bubbly; I am not really sure how I endured my 2.25 hours there, never mind enjoyed it. People like her are usually too much to take, perhaps it was the few drinks I had chatting with some fellow female hockey fan at the bar. Or perhaps I was still happy from having just wrote my Mother's Day cards out. Who knows, but my scalp rub and hand/arm massage were fabulous!

Wednesday we got out early and boss lady let me just blow off the rest of the day which was awesome! My friend Derek got the big and final screw over from our king of shitty bosses and ridiculous excuse for an HR company. Honestly, I think it is best for him in the end and I wish him all of the happiness being away from that hell hole!

Thursday I signed up to do my first speech for Toastmasters -- my Ice Breaker. I was the AH counter... not my favorite job by any means, but at least I am staying involved. They are talking about needing chairs for lead positions... I am considering potentially doing it. We shall see. Thursday was also my only day in the office this week and I STILL managed to lease an apartment! WOOT WOOT


Friday was a pretty cool day. A couple of us from work went into Denver to help spruce up a lower income property. I pulled weeds and scraped sand and painted rails and all sorts of little things. I also totally ditched my gluten free restriction for the day and housed THREE very large and actually delicious pieces of pizza! I was definitely bloated afterward, but no major issues, which I was thankful for. After my interrupted nap, I ended up hanging out with Bill and Rick from work and had a few ciders and a beer (gosh I MISS beer!!) before I had to go into Nitro (the club). I took the guys to Hazels (its an AMAZING liquor store with uber cheap prices) and then we had some Noodle and Company for dinner. YAY for Pad Thai and its rice noodles! Couldn't hold a candle to Pepper Sky, but it will do. Friday night at work was PATHETIC!!

Saturday was a freaking roller coaster. Work was up and down, mostly calm which I was very thankful for after having not really been in the office all week it was definitely needed in order to play catch up and get myself in order. Well mid-day I find out one of my most absolutely best friends from middle school and high school had died in April and I had NO idea! I was shocked, perplexed, confused. There were soo many emotions to deal with I did not even know where to begin. Margie was the third leg in my tripod with Amber. Thankfully, Amber and I have been able to stay so close, but somewhere along the way Margie drifted. Her and I had found each other a few times, but it was never quite like it had been before. As I am writing this I am so heart broken to think that I let her slip away.

On another emotionally weird note Doug (my first real boyfriend, whom I had a 3.5 year relationship with -- and fucked it up real badly)... Got married. I am so happy for him, and his wife, and his family. But at the same time it almost changes looking back and remembering all of the good times we did have together and how I know I should have handled things differently. Live Free No Regrets! Best of luck to the newest Turners, may happiness last you forever and beyond.

Add just to make my Saturday even more unusual, Rick, from work, asked me out Saturday. He's a funny guy, very smart, a huge smart ass! I actually didn't even realize what I had agreed to until after I already done so. I think my biggest concern is the whole dating a co-worker thing, but F-IT!

To Be Continued...

*Star*

Monday, May 6, 2013

Change Hopefully Leads to More Change

So today was a mostly productive day. I have really taken a liking to having Monday's off, and greatly appreciate that Taft is the only thing "work related" that I need to do.. and that is never more than a couple hours for the whole day.

My many accomplishments for the day include:

- embracing my witchiness to help make a solid decision
- picked my next humble abode... for at least the next two months
- scheduled appointment to fix my windshield before it gets any worse (thank you fill glass coverage and no deductible)
- made appointments with the gyno, dentist, and gastro... seeing that I am way over due for them all... I am a little sad because I could not get in to see the gastro until June 3 (still quicker than my docs in Boston) which means I need to extend out this Gluten-Free trial for even longer.
- I make zucchini/squash spaghetti with shrimp, 2 zucchini/squash lasagnas, and cut up a bunch of watermelon... super excited because I should be able to get by without dropping another $70 on groceries this week...
- I finally posted the bikes on craiglists that I have had for a little while taking up room in the house since they are too big for me to ride
- I have decided to full join toastmasters, which is really exciting
- I applied to a job (my goal is 3-5 a week)
- I started to sit down and write out more of my goals and desires -- much more work to do on this...
- I made a conscious effort to try and start working on getting Rosetta Stone set up -- I tried their online demo today and really enjoyed it
- after doing some class work, I decided that it was not going to give me any helpful information for my current situation so I un-enrolled so I can put effort into other areas

I am pretty sure there was more... but you get the point. I am particularly proud of myself for just taking time for myself. I went against my recent attempts to keep myself on a sleep schedule and let myself sleep in... Sadly I am not comfortable enough to actually fully sleep in, but it felt nice regardless. I took a drive and ended up doing some reading at the over-look of Boulder this afternoon, soaking in some sun. I wish I had motivated myself to do some exercise, but ah well I will get there...

Tomorrow starts two days of training in Denver. I am excited to check out the city and hopefully meet some cool people that work for the company. Also! I get my hair cut tomorrow!! I wish I could emphasize the sheer excitement I have about this. To see these split ends gone and hopefully bring some life back to my hair will make me sooo happy.

Well off to bed. Till next time.

*Star*

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Jumbled Mess

BAGH! I thought I had posted last week...

My last entry was a glimpse into the chaotic order of my life at the moment and all of the things I have been trying to undertake... fit-in... or otherwise be involved in...

Since that Post, I volunteered at the Puttin on the Leash: Animals in Wonderland... dressed up at the Ace of Spades thanks to one of my co-workers. I signed up for Bolder Boulder -- a 10K... attempted to start training... think I need new shoes (ouchies to the wallet)... looked at numerous apartments and narrowed it down to four. I started the 3rd job and even made some money on my first night... I was super impressed with myself because I thought I was going to need a 5 hour energy, but I had energy to get me completely through the night and even stayed to hang out for a bit afterwards. I really think I will enjoy this job, in the end of it.

I got some respite staying at my boss' house, house and dog-sitting for her. Although, her dog is the biggest pansy... Staying at her house I also realized just how old I was... getting up WAY before all the college kids on The Hill to take the dog for a walk... in bed as their parties are just starting to get good... not really wanting to have too much a part of any of it.

I got my first ribbon-- or promise of ribbon (clubs out at the moment) -- at my 2nd Toast Masters meeting on Thursday. Looks like I will be joining the group next week. I really enjoy it! And I think I can make some friends out of it, or at least am hoping.

I am in Denver for two days this week for training... and will be getting my hair cut on Tuesday, finally! I am so excited and its at Paul Mitchel School, so it will be a little like back at home... although I am sure the person cutting my hair isn't going to be the sister of someone I was in class with. Then on Friday we are volunteering somewhere, so my only two days in the office are Thursday and Saturday, so I sure hope I can get in some leases!

Still need to get Rosetta Stone in action, and still need to get myself into a routine, and keeping myself going to the gym. But I think I am making some good progress. Finished up one class today... I had started a second, but am not sure it is going to be helpful. I am going to look for another class to start up...

I am really holding on to my desire to work for The Starr Conspiracy, I have sent out cards, applied, kept in touch with people... I just want this job, and more importantly know I can do the job well. I am keeping fingers crossed and trying to not be too annoying... So please send some good vibes for me.


This is post is all over the place and I apologize... my brain has not settled in a few days. Too many things going on and starting up... hopefully, everything will calm down into a nice routine... here is to hoping!